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DEC 17 - DEC 24, 2015

City Hall Jokes

DEC 17, 2015

Hot on the heels of the surprise announcement that a methadone clinic will be setting up shop in the former school district offices on 6th Street, the Reporter is chasing a hot rumor that Dyster's city hall is going to locate an ISIS owned Burger King on Rainbow Boulevard.
The 2016 city budget - that was approved in secrecy on November 17 - has been dubbed "the stealth budget." That's because just like the stealth bomber people don't realize it's there until things start exploding and everything goes up in smoke.
While Santa Claus disappeared two weeks ago during the Dyster-Owens Holly Trolly there's no truth to the rumor that he disappeared inside the Trott Building methadone clinic.
However, it's true that Santa was seen waiting for a bus on the corner of Main and Cleveland with Totes McGoat earlier that day.
Paul Dyster, Totes McGoat and Santa Claus walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and yells, "No creeps allowed! Totes and Santa, you can stay."
There's lots of talk as to whether the city hall men's club will finally allow Kristen Grandinetti to become council chairperson. Councilmen Walker and Touma said they have no problem with a female taking the chairman's seat. They said, "Our only request is that the person holding the position possess an X and Y chromosome."
Will this guy ever admit to knowing anything about anything? Mayor Dyster didn't know about the loss of 200 jobs at DuPont/Chemours. He hadn't a clue about the planned methadone clinic. He didn't know about the plans for the Y becoming a homeless shelter until the sale of the building was finalized. And the true cause of the frozen water lines on 72nd Street was a mystery to him until a secret engineering report that he was privy to from day one eventually became public. Is he that out of touch or is he that devious? We report you decide, but you're stuck with him for four more years.







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Dyster's Letter to Top City Employees Touches Off Fear And Paranoia For The Holidays
Religious Organization Takes Big Role In New Look Niagara Falls Economy
Reporter's Call For An Elected City Controller Meets With Rousing Support
Sex Offenders Drive Down Property Values, Quality of Life
We Told You So: Dyster Administration Was Engineered to Fail From the Start
Free Workshops for Families of Special Needs Children Offered
Housing Authority a Key Player in Commodification of Human Services
Is Poverty Industry Part of a True Growth Plan
Hard Ball Questions We Would Ask Dyster If He Appeared On Our Talk Show
Two Methadone Clinics to Address Rising Problem of Heroin Addiction
Elusive City Engineer Job Description Absent From City's Official Website
Is There a Conspiracy to Stop Kristen Grandinetti From Becoming Chairwoman?
King Con Shmuel Shmueli Learns New Trade: Stiffing Lawyers and Winning Through Losing --Lawsuits
Cult of NXIVM Series Part 5: Bronfman Sisters Join NXIVM and Lose Millions of Dollars
Cohen to Represent Mascia at Hearing
What America Desperately Needs: 1 - Religion Defined and 2 - Donald Trump as President
Enjoy The 'Time of Your Life' at Ricky's Nifty Fifty Pizza Junction 'Come In and Be Yourself', Says Ricky
McNall Will Be New Chairman Of Niagara Co. Legislature
New Bid Launched to Track State's Costs to Defend Canalside Suit
News of the Weird
Half-Court Basketball League Starting at Lockport YMCA
Thunder of Niagara Air Show wins coveted Dick Schram Memorial Community Relations Award for 2015
Black ECC Executive Files Discrimination Complaint Against School
Bills Season Pretty Much Over
City Hall Jokes
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©2014 The Niagara Falls Reporter Inc.
POB 3083, Niagara Falls, N.Y. 14304
Phone: (716) 284-5595

Publisher and Editor in Chief: Frank Parlato
Managing Editor: Dr. Chitra Selvaraj
Senior Editor: Tony Farina