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Thanksgiving being over, I can revert to seeing red full time. And I am sick unto death of hearing about how "God" saved two Christian fundamentalist ninnyhammers who went into Afghanistan to preach Jesus Christ in a country whose current regime has said that it is a crime punishable by death.
Yet these two pea-brained females, Heather Mercer and Dayna Curry, decided their Texas version of Protestantism, the Antioch Community Church, which is several centuries younger than Islam, was the salvation of Afghanistan. A country whose true salvation lies in ridding itself of warring tribes, which hate everybody, including their own people. A country whose people need to be fed, given medical care and not used as pawns in the dance of dominant countries to control the universe.
Instead, they get two twits.
Mercer and Curry reminded me of the Jehovah's Witnesses duo who used to knock on my door once a week, usually when I was in the bathtub. My mistake was living in a Detroit townhouse, where they had access to the front door. I was polite the first couple of times -- I was young -- surly on the next few encounters, but on Visit Seven of these two well-scrubbed jackasses handing me the latest issue of the Watchtower, I treated them to a stream of invective and obscenities learned at my editor's knee. Last visit of Richard and Victoria.
I reckon that's just how the Muslims of Afghanistan felt when confronted by two 20-something chits -- one from Western New York, to our shame -- both women, already a major problem in an Islamic country, and preaching an alien religion. Clearly, these girls have the intelligence of zits.
By the by, twit twins, God didn't save you. U.S. Special Forces did. God was right busy that day, protecting the men and women fighting to rid a region that has been abused for 1,000 years, not to mention by this latest batch of spawns of the devil, the Taliban. I don't believe God has time to spare to rescue the stubbornly stupid, you self-righteous morons. God was trying to rescue a country from the clutches of the Taliban and Osama bin Laden and protect the military men and women trying to fight a war they didn't start but were determined to finish. Good on you, God.
Frankly, if the Taliban would have executed the twit twins, I wouldn't be lighting any candles for their souls. I don't know what their church teaches -- and I don't care -- but mine says inviting a death sentence amounts to suicide, an act of self-destruction mine forbids. (I'm pretty certain a couple of "saints" I read about when growing up got sent south when they reached the pearly gates for being too damned arrogant and stupid to deserve heaven.)
Still, the Taliban also were holding six foreign relief workers whose only crime was trying to succor women, children and the elderly in that hellhole. They were not trying to ram their version of God down someone's throat. Personally, I would have been happy to leave Dumb and Dumber to their fate, but not those aid workers. So, good on you, Special Forces.
Now the simple-minded twins are pledging to go back to Afghanistan to continue their "work." Ladies, work on getting a brain that works. Islam, like Christianity, is a religion so old it goes off on weird tangents at times. Any religion that survives a few centuries is bound to attract the occasional oddball and loon.
An example: The Christian Crusades against Islam in the Middle East were about the stupidest exercise in futility anyone with a history degree ever studied. (Not to mention the folks who had to fight them.) We had kings of Europe ignoring the suffering of their people to spend the modern equivalent of billions of dollars to battle a non-threat to them or their countries. And don't get me started on the Popes of the Middle Ages, so corrupt and frequently outright crazy that they ignored a church hierarchy that sold the promise of heaven for cash. The kings needed to get their countrymen's minds off their misery, and the Popes needed a rallying cry for a church that was rotting from within.
Muslim leader Saladin, who defeated a couple of those armies, was, according to contemporary accounts, an educated man, a charmer, gracious in both victory and defeat. A man who was trying to protect his religion on his turf. He sure as hell didn't send unwashed, underfed peasants against seasoned warriors and people they had no grievance against. Those peasants died or were enslaved because their leaders told them it was a Holy War.
Am I ringing any bells here, folks?
Osama bin Laden says terrorism against the United States is a jihad, a Holy War. If my country had not been attacked by that man, who is so ugly a mirror doesn't want to be seen with him, I'd leave the Islamic World alone. But he attacked me and mine and I don't take that well.
So, I want him dead. Disemboweled. Head on a pick at Rockefeller Center. Okay, I won't go on. I hate men and women who have no understanding of humanity, whatever religion they avow. I have read the holiest writings of all major religions and a couple of interesting offshoots (but that's another column) and none of them advocate murdering innocents for any reason. Even in a Holy War.
I'm sure many of you disagree with me, for whatever reasons, about those two angels of dimwittedness. But if you want to write a letter criticizing what I've written, have the guts to sign your name.
When I get to hell, I'll look you up.