City Hall Jokes

"This is another fine mess you've gotten us into!"
John Accardo to Glenn Choolokian as Accardo channeled Oliver Hardy on election night

Paul Dyster, a registered sex offender, and an undocumented immigrant walk into a bar. Dyster turns to the bartender and says, "They're with me, they have to drink somewhere."

"The majority of voters didn't vote for me, they really, really, didn't vote for me."
Paul Dyster looking in the mirror the morning after the election.

Don't go changing...again.
There's no truth to the rumor that John Ceretto is switching parties again. It seems that Ceretto's errand boy, Rob Nichols, overheard the assemblyman telling friends that "I'll be signing up for the New Year's Party" and misunderstood his boss.

Last week Paul Dyster announced two meetings: the meeting of the "people and agencies I provided favors for in return for votes," to be held in the grand ballroom of the Niagara Conference Center, and "the annual meeting of the Paul Dyster fan club" to be held at the bus stop on the corner of Main and Third.

City hall survey
What do you think will occur first?
A) peace in the Middle East
B) the Hamister groundbreaking
C) Paul Dyster speaking the truth on anything
D) none of the above

The three top movie rentals on 72nd Street:
Ice Station Zebra
Frozen
The Ice Storm

The three top movie rentals at city hall
A) The Heist
B) Dirty Rotten Scoundrels
C) Sex and the City