Paonessa compares Greenbagg to Bozo the Clown
“I was prepared to bust his chops,” said internet TV host Sal Paonessa about his guest of last Friday, the bizarre Niagara Falls artist, Oliver H. Greenbagg, “But I didn't need to, Greenbagg does that to himself.”
Paonessa, with Rosemarie Mariglia, host a live, television-style talk show, on the internet, at www.nbn7900.com on Monday, Wednesday and Fridays at 6:30 p.m.
Greenbagg appeared Friday on Paonessa with his stumbling, bumbling monologues. For those who haven't seen him, he is comical-looking, with prematurely white, unkempt hair and a snowy white, bushy moustache.
Comparisons are odious, indeed, but Rose made one, comparing Greenbagg’s white hair to a white turban.
Greenbagg has made it his mission to write books and make appearances to persuade people not to abuse alcohol, tobacco, drugs and over-eating.
He says obvious things about people who ruin their lives. He kicks them when they’re down. At first, one is inclined to brush him off as a nincompoop. But interlaced with platitudes, flat jokes and dumb props are granules of profound wisdom which might be accidental, just as a broken clock tells the right time twice a day.
One wonders if he may be engaging in some unique, psychological ploy of pretending to be a happy moron while he calls you a stupid moron.
After his appearance on Vince Anello's WJJL radio show, gambling addicts called in and said how stupid he was in his comments against gambling. A known drug user made the comment that Greenbagg was “quite likely the greatest ass he ever heard.”
He got reactions from people he was targeting.
On Paonessa’s show, however, conjecture was the order of the day when Paonessa showed a much-admired photograph of this writer and suggested Greenbagg was one and the same as this writer. Paonessa later admitted the statement was untrue, then made the ugly comparison between Greenbagg and the comic genius known as Bozo the Clown.
Paonessa told his audience this writer has pushed Greenbagg suggesting the motive was 25 cents per book sold as this writer’s share of proceeds.
“Come on, Frank, come on down and get your quarter. We just sold a book. I have 25 cents waiting for you.”
Greenbagg continued apparently oblivious to carping criticism and ball breaking as he mouthed platitudes and obvious statements, such as: “I really believe people can do a lot better than what people are doing in the world.”
Rose asked, “Is there anything here different than anyone has said before?”
Greenbagg's response: “I would say that, you know, that everybody should have to read my books, if you have any kind of overindulgence or abuse, if you have a tendency of abusing things. Read it. Then you will have that content and information.”
Like what? Sal asked.
At times like this, Greenbagg goes into his barrage of insults:
A young man on drugs walked into a dentist's office and says, "Can you help me? I think I'm a moth."
The dentist replies, "You don't need a dentist. You need a psychiatrist."
"Yes, I know," the man said.
The dentist asked, "So then why did you come in here?"
The man replied, "The light was on."
What the hell does that prove?
If he wasn’t on drugs, he would not have thought he was a moth.
At one point, Greenbagg suggested drug addicts trying to quit should put drugs in a bag with used shoe pads.
“That will curb desire when they smell the stinky foot odor,” he said.
Paonessa, who is a police officer, challenged him, saying that drug users, when accosted by police, often put their drugs inside a condom and insert it in their anal orifice. Then, after police leave, they take the condom out, open it and readily use their drugs.
Yeah, Greenbagg said, What are the first five words a crackhead in a three, piece tailored suit hears?
"Will the defendant please rise.’"
“What do women addicted to heroin got in common with ice-hockey players?
“They both change clothes after three periods.”
“What do you have in a room full of tweakers?
“A complete set of teeth!”
“What did one deadhead say to the other when he ran out of weed?
"’Hey, man, this music sucks!’"
“What did the heroin addict get on his IQ test?
“Drool.”
“My doctor told me to stay away from methamphetamine. So I bought a fifteen-foot straw.”
“I heard that your mother was a speedfreak whore in a leper colony for 15 years and loved every minute of it, that is until she found out that the other whores got paid.”
“So you don’t think it strange that every vacation you wind up in Amsterdam or Jamaica?”
“The lab technician testing your urine sample gets high off the fumes.”
“Greenbagg” said Paonessa, “obviously said a lot of stupid shit, but it was entertaining. I like the guy.”
Greenbagg’s ads appear in this paper (see back cover), hawking his four books: DeGamblization; DeFatlization; DeDruglization and DeAlcoholization. If you’ve tried everything else to quit, he says what do you have to lose? At $4.95, the price of one of his books, he may be right.